<p><span class="h-card" translate="no"><a href="https://hachyderm.io/@fasterthanlime" class="u-url mention">@<span>fasterthanlime</span></a></span> …and I say this as a recovering minimizer/gaslighter myself.</p><p>In kind of ashamed it only clicked in my 30s — that of course, OF COURSE trying to rewrite history to avoid conflict is just accumulating emotional debt.</p><p>My brain knew, now my heart does too.</p>